I got word that my buddy Nick Erker had a serious accident that occurred on the exact same day as my subway mishap (within three hours of each other, for that matter). Though his fall sounded very scary and involved seizures and a broken cheekbone. He's fine now, thank goodness! "All we wanted was a little attention," Erker deadpanned.
It seems we both coulda used something like this Isolator mask from 1925:
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